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"You’re not weak to seek help. There’s too much going on in our world to take it on alone."

About Jed:Portrait of Jed in black and white

I’m an engineer working in the technology space, I run my own company ‘digitalvibe’. I’m a creator and passionate programmer.

WHAT WAS THE MAJOR TURNING POINT IN YOUR RECOVERY FROM DEPRESSION?

Depression for me is an ongoing battle, it’s the little things and the everyday combined with the existential. I have a few moments that stand out to me but one more than others; at the very pinnacle of my depression, I came home to my wife with another man. This was the turning point. As tragic as it sounds, it was a profound moment of clarity for me in realizing that I can only control how I react to the world and I cannot control the world itself. In that moment of trauma, I gave myself grace.

WHAT ARE SOME THINGS THAT REALLY HELPED?

Turn your phone off

  • Disconnect. This was critically important for me because of how close to social media I was. Spend the time to tweak your social media to see the things that make you happy. I followed lots of dog accounts.

Talk… a lot

  • My friends saved me, I droned to them my circumstance on repeat, and they listened and supported me without question. I went over with them events that led me to the position I was in. I was totally vulnerable.

Be vulnerable

  • Open yourself, be honest with what you did to contribute so you can learn, but also don’t be too hard on yourself (I struggle with this).

Professional help

  • I sought professionals who could give me a different opinion and a path forward. It’s often too much to put on your friends or family – let a professional guide you. I learned so much about myself and I go to therapy regularly to this day.

WHAT ADVICE WOULD YOU GIVE TO OTHER GUYS FIGHTING DEPRESSION?

You’re not weak to seek help. There’s too much going on in our world to take it on alone – even as a man. You’re not alone.

Keep fighting and adopt a warrior mindset but don’t lose your sensitivity in the process. This is the beauty of the man’s position in our society. We are expected to be a bulwark in the sea of emotionally stimulating media, don’t fulfill that expectation. Break the cycle, be sensitive and pay close attention to what happens.

Bring your authentic self to the world, we need you. Build a community of inclusion and share your thoughts with other men so that we can build each other up for everyone.

Jed Forrest, West Kelowna, British Columbia, Canada

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