Five Steps to Overcoming Suicidal Thoughts
Here are five tips towards overcoming suicidal thoughts that can help move you away from hurting yourself and towards recovery.
Medically reviewed by Dr. John Ogrodniczuk, PhD – Written by Joshua Beharry.
Here are five tips towards overcoming suicidal thoughts that can help move you away from hurting yourself and towards recovery.
Medically reviewed by Dr. John Ogrodniczuk, PhD – Written by Joshua Beharry.
"Though It Can Be Tough To Be Hopeful, There Are Ways To Overcome Suicidal Thoughts."
Suicidal thoughts can be very difficult to deal with or understand. Sometimes they can be fleeting, but other times they can be stronger urges and fantasies that promise relief from seemingly unbearable pain.
Intense thoughts of suicide tend to occur for only brief periods of time, but when we’re caught in their grip, it can feel as if we’ll never escape.
We can think of experiencing intense suicidal thoughts like riding out a storm. Even the most powerful storms don’t last forever, so if we can stop ourselves from acting on our most extreme thoughts, we will eventually move toward a less painful and depressed mood. Once the storm is over, we can more clearly see other options we have for improving our lives.
Below are some tips to guide us through these difficult moments.
The first thing we need to do when experiencing intense thoughts of suicide is to remove ourselves from potentially dangerous areas or situations, such as waiting for a train, driving alone, crossing a bridge, or being near guns, knives, or medications. This will help to reduce the risk of acting on these thoughts.
It’s also important to avoid substances like drugs and alcohol, as they can amplify impulsive feelings and make it harder to overcome suicidal thoughts. Additionally, certain music, photos, or films may make us feel worse, so steering clear of these can help minimize potential triggers.
Once we’re in a safe space, we can start to focus on controlling our breathing.
When we’re under stress, our heart rate increases, and our breathing becomes quick and shallow. By slowing our breathing, we take active control to reduce our heart rate – and in essence, reverse engineer a sense of calm.
This technique can also help shift our attention away from suicidal thoughts. Here’s one way to try it:
Focus on the present—on taking things one step at a time to get through this moment or day—rather than being consumed by worries about the future or the past.
Sometimes activities like tidying up a room, watching a comforting show, reading a book, creating art, or doing a puzzle, can pull you away from these thoughts, offering a sense of control or relief.
Other times, you may need more specific strategies. The goal of the following strategies is to shift our attention away from thoughts of hurting ourselves onto something else.
This strategy may sound simple, but it’s a very powerful technique that can shut down suicidal thoughts before they spiral into a vicious cycle. It’s similar to ignoring a bully – the less attention we give them, the less power they have.
By doing so, we are essentially telling ourselves, “I’m thinking about ending my life. These thoughts are part of depression. I’m not going to engage with them. Instead, I’m going to go back to what I was doing.”
If the thoughts are too intense to get back on track with what we were doing, using our senses can help us refocus. Here’s a simple technique to try:
Visualization involves trying to imagine things in our mind in a controlled way, which helps block out suicidal thoughts.
Grounding works by connecting us to our physical environment and reminding us of exactly where we are in the present moment, which takes us away from our negative thoughts.
Grounding is similar to using our senses but places more focus on our own physical sensations and connection to where we are.
A simple grounding technique is to focus on the parts of your body that are in contact with the floor, or the chair you’re sitting in. Feel the weight of your body and notice how the ground supports you. Try to feel rooted to where you are, strong in your stance, and take note of the sensations you feel. You can also practice this while walking by feeling the ground beneath your feet and noticing the textures of the surface.
Another effective method is to take a brief, very cold shower or bath, which can help redirect intense thoughts and provide a kind of sensory reset. Similarly, you can hold an ice cube in your hand until it melts, concentrating on the sensation of coldness as a way to shift your thoughts and attention to the present moment.
Often when we feel overwhelmed, our muscles tense without us realizing it. Our shoulders or jaw may tighten, or we may clench our fists. This is part of our ‘fight-or-flight’ response.
Like controlling our breathing, muscle relaxations help us take an active role in relaxing the physical manifestations of our stress response, and tells our body that it’s okay to calm down.
Explore our Mindfulness for Men course for in-depth guidance on grounding techniques, muscle relaxation, staying present, and stepping back from difficult thoughts, all designed to help you build emotional resilience. Through guided meditations, practical exercises, and daily applications, you can develop these essential skills at your own pace, fostering a greater sense of well-being and stability in your daily life.
Reaching out to others is crucial. You don’t have to – and shouldn’t – try battling intense thoughts of suicide on your own.
In order for people to be able to help, we have to let them know what’s going on. Others can provide us with empathy, compassion, and support – all of which are critical for helping us feel like we’re not alone in our experience.
It’s incredible how just saying our thoughts out loud to another person can help take power away from these thoughts.
If the people you reach out to aren’t available, or you want to connect with someone who has more experience handling these kinds of situations, we strongly recommend contacting a crisis support centre.
One of the hardest parts of managing suicidal thoughts is not having the hope or motivation to employ the strategies described above.
Depression can rob us of hope. We may desperately want to reach out but feel like it won’t matter. But we all matter. You matter.
Reflect on your reasons to live. Think about the people and things that are important to you. What keeps you going during tough times? Hold on to that.
If you’re struggling to find hope, know that others have felt the same and have been able to get better. Many men have shared their experiences with suicidal thinking in our recovery stories.
These men aren’t any better or different than us – we have the same capability to recover.
As humans, we have an incredible capacity to heal.
We can’t let suicidal thoughts deprive us of our future – we need to create space for the possibility of healing and feeling well again.
Having a Suicide Safety Plan can also help reduce risks and provide crucial support when feeling overwhelmed.