Helping someone at imminent risk of suicide
This is the level of risk that requires our intervention to protect someone’s life.
This is the level of risk that requires our intervention to protect someone’s life.
“Having some experience preparing, I was able to remain calm and call 9-1-1 while helping to ensure my friend’s safety until First Responders arrived.”
Suicidal thoughts arise from profound pain, hopelessness, and/or emptiness (like life has lost all meaning). The despair that underlies suicidal thoughts can be all-encompassing.
Though depression carries a risk of suicide, research and experience has shown that with timely intervention, suicides are preventable.[1]
Learning how to support a man in suicidal crisis is similar to learning how to provide emergency first aid. Our goal isn’t to ‘fix’ or ‘cure’ him. Rather, it’s to keep him alive until we can connect him with further medical support.
Helping a man during a mental health crisis can be very stressful. Going over the steps below can help us remain calm and responsive should we ever find ourselves in a situation like this.
The differences among suicide risk levels relate to intent and action.
At high risk, suicide is a persistent thought or fantasy. It’s a way to imagine escaping the pains of depression. The person may have a plan, with a desire to, one day, follow through with the suicidal thoughts/plan. A man at high risk tends to have the following warning signs:
Imminent risk is when a person has a specific suicide plan (including a method or place to end his life) and has stated an actual intent to act on this plan now or very soon.
Imminent risk would involve the person telling you or clearly hinting that he has the intent to die now or very shortly and how he will follow through i.e., telling you he’s going to overdose on medication, poison himself, use a weapon he already has or is in the process of obtaining, or walk to or stand near the edge of a building or bridge.
Questions to Clarify Risk Level
It’s a good idea to be open and direct, so you can gather enough information to know what a person is really thinking about.
It’s important to know that mentioning suicide, when framed in terms of suicide prevention and referring someone to resources, will not make things worse.
Depending on risk level, you can follow the steps below for imminent risk or see our Manage Suicide Risk page for how to provide less immediate support.
In circumstances where a guy’s life is at risk, it’s essential that we intervene to stop him (as long as we are not jeopardizing our own or another’s safety in doing so).
The order in which you take the steps below may vary based on the situation and his reactions or responses.
These steps can be modified based on whether or not you are physically present with someone or in contact via phone, text, messaging app, or social media platform.
Ask him to move away from or put down any potential means to die by suicide.
What you can say:
It’s okay to feel stressed or scared yourself, but we want to make sure our words and actions emphasize care and concern. Despite what he may be thinking, let him know that you and others really do care about him.
What you can say:
As shared in some of our Recovery Stories, men can and do get better after thinking about suicide, and even after surviving a suicide attempt. Let the man you care about know that his recovery is possible too.
If you have doubts about his ability to recovery, please see our Recovery Stories. If the man you’re supporting doubts the prospect of his recovery, you can share these stories with him as well. Hearing the positive recovery experiences of other men can be a source of hope for him and let him know he’s not alone.
What you can say:
Encourage him to share his thoughts and feelings with you. Rephrase what he says to show that you’re listening and want to understand. This means being compassionate, non-judgmental, and open to hearing what he has to say – skills outlined in our article on Supporting a Man Through Active Listening.
What you can say:
The next step is to get him somewhere safe, which in this case means the nearest hospital, or if there are no hospitals nearby, by calling 9-1-1 (999 in the UK, 112 in most European nations, or 000 in Australia, or your local emergency telephone number).
Let him know you are taking action to get him help to ensure his safety. Being honest and transparent about this can help him feel more supported and less alone during these crucial moments.
It’s important to acknowledge that we may need to take actions against a person’s wishes, such as calling 9-1-1. It’s always better to err on the side of caution when someone’s life is at stake. Calling 9-1-1 for a mental health emergency related to suicide is a responsible and necessary action.
If he needs some encouragement
What happens when you call 9-1-1
Here’s what to expect if you ever have to call 9-1-1 for a man in a mental health crisis.
It’s important to note that going to the hospital does not necessarily guarantee the man you are helping will be admitted/hospitalized.
ER staff will conduct a thorough assessment of his mental health and determine the best course of action based on their findings. This may involve hospitalization for observation, medication management, or referral to mental health professionals or other services for ongoing care.
If he’s not admitted to the hospital, it’s still important to encourage him to seek professional help for his mental health. See our Manage Suicide Risk page for other ways you can help.
What does hospital admission for mental health look like?
Supporting someone who is experiencing suicidal thinking can be emotionally draining. Make sure you set time aside to take care of yourself and seek support from friends, family, or a mental health professional if needed.
Depending on your relationship with him, try to check back in with him to show your continued support and care.
Be prepared for a range of responses. Some men may be thankful for your intervention to safeguard their safety, while others may express resentment for calling 9-1-1 or taking them to a hospital. Once he reaches a better headspace, it is likely that any resentment and anger will fade and, in turn, he will come to recognize and appreciate your willingness to intervene and get him help.
While helping in a crisis can be a tricky situation to navigate, by following the tips above, you can feel assured that you took the best steps to intervene and ensure his safety and recovery.
References: