Before we can fully delve into the process of cognitive restructuring, we need to be able to recognize the thoughts we want to reframe.
Negative thought patterns–also called cognitive distortions–operate just beneath the surface of our consciousness, subtly influencing our thoughts and emotions until our perspective becomes much more negative and distorted.
Over time, these thoughts become more automatic, creating an illusion of truth. However, it is crucial to recognize that, particularly in the context of depressive thoughts, they merely present a skewed and limited version of reality.
These cognitive distortions can have real impacts, heightening our stress, dragging down our mood, or triggering withdrawal from activities and experiences that once brought us joy. As these distorted thoughts take hold, they can increasingly isolate us from friends, family, and the world around us, perpetuating a cycle of negativity.
By learning about negative thought patterns and thinking critically about our thoughts, we can better recognize them and take back control of our lives.
LIST OF 10 COMMON DISTORTED THINKING PATTERNS
1. All-or-nothing thinking
- “Shit. I forgot to put the gas cap back on after filling up. I never do anything right.”
- “I didn’t do well on the first test. I’m going to fail this class.”
- “If I’m going to be late, there’s no point in even going.”
2. Mind reading
- “They think I’m boring. They have better things to do than hang out with me.”
- “My sister didn’t ask me to help her make dinner. She must think I’m a bad cook.”
- “I can tell by the way they’re looking at me, these guys must think I’m an idiot.”
3. Fortune-telling/Forecasting
- “There’s no point in even trying. I know I’m not going to get the job anyway.”
- “If I ask for help on this task, he’s going to say no.”
4. Over-generalization
- “My relationship with Susan didn’t work out. Relationships never work.”
- “I made a fool of myself at the party last night. I have no social skills.”
5. Discounting the positive
- “I may be a decent father, but anybody can do that.”
- “Yeah, my boss liked my idea, but he was just being nice.”
- “That guy only wants to be friends because he’s lonely and there’s no one else.”
6. Jumping to conclusions
- “My girlfriend hasn’t replied to my text in hours. She must be sick of me.”
- “My co-worker stopped talking about his wedding at work. I bet it’s because he doesn’t want to invite me.”
7. ‘Shoulds’ or ‘Musts’
- “I must get straight A’s. Anything less isn’t good enough.”
- “I should workout 5 times this week. That’s the only way I can be fit.”
- “I should have thought of something better to say.”
8. Labelling
- “I can’t believe I said that. I’m such an idiot.”
- “I’m so stupid for forgetting to send that email.”
- “I’m just a waste of space, that’s why no one likes me.”
9. Self-blame
- “My boss looks mad. It must be something I did wrong.”
- “My kid doesn’t get good grades in school. I must not be a good father.”
- “If they don’t like me, it’s because there’s something wrong with me.”
10. Catastrophizing
- “Since I can’t pay this bill, my credit rating will go to shit and I’ll lose the house.”
- “If I don’t start a whole new workout routine today, I’ll never get in shape.”
- “If she breaks up with me, no one else is ever going to want to date me either.”
For a more comprehensive list of common cognitive distortions or additional examples, see our article on 16 Common Negative Thought Patterns.
Identifying Cognitive Distortions
Now that we have a better understanding of what these automatic thoughts can look like, let’s revisit the thought (from the previous page) to identify the cognitive distortions being used:
Thought: ‘I have no good ideas. People think I am stupid. I am a terrible employee.’
Distortions:
- All-or-nothing thinking: Concluding “I have no good ideas” from not seeing an idea implemented.
- Mind reading: Assuming coworkers perceive them as ‘stupid’ without evidence.
- Over-generalizing: Applying one interaction to their overall work quality.
- Labeling: Thinking of themselves as a ‘terrible employee’.
Knowing about negative thought patterns and being able to recognize them in our own thinking is a valuable skill. However, like many things in life, knowledge alone isn’t always enough without taking action to back it up.
The next page will provide us with a template so we can begin to work on our thoughts and make real, lasting change.
