If you are being deceitful, your partner will likely want to distance themselves from you, both emotionally and physically.
Building a Foundation
Trust is a vital component in happy and successful relationships.
Trust is a vital component in happy and successful relationships.
Trust provides us with a sense of security and loyalty with our partners.
There are few things as comforting as having a strong sense of trust in your relationship, but it takes time and intentionality to develop.
This section of the course, on building trust, is divided into four parts:
Let’s start off with why trust is so important.
To trust means to rely on another person because you feel safe with them and have confidence that they will not hurt or betray your trust. Trust allows us to be vulnerable and open up to our partners without having to protect ourselves.
Here’s how trust can impact your relationship for the better:
Trust allows you to be more open and giving. Trust fosters better understanding and mutual respect. It makes the relationship stronger, where both people can come together without being afraid of judgment.
Trust also allows you to navigate conflict. When you trust your partner, you are more willing to commit to finding solutions to issues because you feel allied in areas that mean the most to you.
Even if your partner does something disappointing, you are more likely to give them the benefit of the doubt and see the good in them if you trust them.
When you trust one another, you feel safe knowing that your partner has your back and can be relied upon for comfort, care, and support.
Trusting your partner also allows your nervous system to relax, rest, and reset. By establishing a strong foundation of trust, your relationship can be a source of security and comfort for both parties involved, particularly if this has not always been the case in past relationships with family or past partners.
Trust takes time to build, and if you consistently fail to follow through on promises or commitments, your partner will begin to have low expectations of you.
A lack of trust can also affect your mental health in the following ways:
If you are being deceitful, your partner will likely want to distance themselves from you, both emotionally and physically.
If your partner feels wronged by you, they may fixate on this, causing them to withdraw or be angry with you. This can stifle connection and closeness.
Your partner may constantly doubt what you tell them and react by becoming more closed off. For instance, incessantly calling or texting your partner to keep tabs on them can drive them away.
Your partner might be afraid of what you will do next, or worry that you won’t be there when they need you.
When your partner can’t trust the closest person in their life (you), they are bound to experience feelings of loneliness and isolation.
There are a number of things that you can do to help promote trust in your relationship. These include:
Be honest and forthcoming when you violate expectations or hurt your partner.
If trust has been damaged in your relationship, there are things you can do to rebuild trust, intimacy, and connection. Steps you can take include:
Patience is also important. It may take time to rebuild trust, but continuing to work toward improving your relationship can help you eventually mend damaged connections.
The final key factor in building trust has to do with setting and respecting each other’s boundaries (emotional and physical), and is the topic of our next section.