In this section, we move from noticing the signs that a guy is going through a rough time to actively helping him. The goal of this section is to build confidence in providing support in a way that is helpful, respectful, and empowering.
It’s tempting to jump in with advice or solutions, but often the most helpful thing is to listen without trying to fix
In this section of the course, we’ll learn how to apply the key principles of peer support, how to actively listen (and other important skills), and how to start a conversation.
Let’s get started.
In the Introduction to our Peer Support Course, we reviewed the principles that underlie effective peer support. Now, let’s look at how those principles guide us when we’re supporting someone.
It’s tempting to jump in with advice or solutions, but often the most helpful thing is to listen without trying to fix. Support the person in exploring what he wants or needs. Let him make his own choices, and remind him that he has strength and agency, even if things feel overwhelming right now.
Recovery looks different for everyone. It’s not always about “getting back to normal” but about finding a way forward and building a meaningful life, even while dealing with challenges. Keep hope alive and encourage small steps toward what matters most to him.
Sometimes the best support is simply being there without judgment. Let him talk at his own pace. Validate his feelings with phrases like “That sounds really tough” or “It makes sense you feel that way”. Listening creates space for healing.
When someone’s struggling, they may lose sight of their strengths. Gently remind him of the qualities you admire or times he’s gotten through difficulties in the past. Help him see the parts of himself that are still strong and capable.
Support should always be offered, not forced. Let the person guide how much he wants to share, and when. Respect his privacy and avoid pushing him to open up if he’s not ready. Just knowing you’re there can be enough for him.
You don’t have to be available 24/7 or have all the answers. Supporting someone doesn’t mean sacrificing your own well-being. It’s okay to set boundaries, take breaks, or encourage the person to connect with professional help if needed.
Everyone’s experience of mental health is shaped by their background, values, and identity. Be open-minded and curious – never assume you know what someone needs based on your own experience. Instead, ask and listen with curiosity and openness.
Often, people going through tough times feel isolated or hopeless. A few simple words can go a long way: “You’re not alone”, “I believe in you”, or “I’ve seen you come through hard things before”. Be a steady voice of encouragement, even when progress is slow.
Now that we’ve covered the core principles of effective peer support, let’s explore how to apply them using essential, practical skills.